Mental Wellbeing
The societies we grow up in shape the way we think. Our early life’s experience moulds how we emotionally experience the world. The people we grew up with hand us a rule book on how life is to be lived. Most of our thoughts and opinions are not really our own. They are planted into us throughout our lives. Guardians, gurus, peers, and the media; they all play a role in how we are programmed. As young people, we have little ability to influence our way of thinking. Later in life, we believe that our interests, drives, values, abilities, and emotional patterns constitute our personality.
What dictates our habits and our emotional reactions to situations? What moral code of judgement do we lean on? Do we subconsciously project our subjective thinking onto the words and actions of others? Are we aware of our actions that are driven by fear? Should we reparent ourselves later in life? These are questions we don’t often stop to ask.
There comes a point when a spanner is thrown in the works forcing us to question our ways. These catalytic moments stem from the most difficult times in our lives. They could be the death of a loved one, a relationship breakup, sudden illness, the loss of an opportunity we deeply craved for, or others of similar gravity. On occasion, they may even be inspired by envy. Such moments make us question what works for us, and what doesn’t. Are we indeed getting the most from our short time on the planet, or are we subconsciously being held back by our preprogrammed behaviour, and repetitive thoughts.
Tough moments have the energy to inspire resilience, institute change, and foster growth. They motivate us to re-invent, to arise, and to become better versions of ourselves. Tough moments inspire us to observe that voice in our heads, and appreciate that the biggest battles we wage are the ones we fight in our mind, with our preconditioned selves.
The personal development that comes from healing our emotional wounds, and from correcting our pre-programmed habits and limiting beliefs, helps us live with intent. It helps us live with respect and compassion for ourselves. It helps us share love with others without condition.
Here is a selection of books that helped me along my personal growth journey. They helped me move towards a space of gratitude, peace, and inner contentment.
- Authentic Happiness - Martin Seligman
- Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It - Kamal Ravikant
- Waking the Tiger - Peter Levine
- Surrounded by Idiots: The Four Types of Human Behaviour - Thomas Erikson
- When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress - Gabor Maté
- Don’t Believe Everything You Think: Why Your Thinking Is The Beginning & End Of Suffering - Joseph Nguyen
The bottom line is this.
- Be kind. Both to yourself, and to others.
- It may sound corny, but love is the answer. Love unconditionally.
- Be grateful for the cards handed to you in life. No one has them all good. No one has them all bad.
- Bless those that treat you with indifference. They help you grow.
- Comparison steals your joy. Focus on yourself and your personal development.
- Let go. Create life goals from inspiration and not desperation. Engage in thought, not thinking.